asking for something

today, I publicly asked for money for the first time.

I admit, it was asking for money in order to use it for something specific. I asked for money so I could buy myself a new laptop.

it’s a weird feeling. it’s considered one of the “worst” things to do in our society, I guess, a society whose ideas of social status and justice are built around labour and private property.

it’s also a good feeling, a feeling of experiment. and also, I think I’m really gonna get that laptop.

I want to be honest when it comes to money. I want to break the circle of silence. I want to publicly state my needs and issues. I want to be able to say that I have no time for labour because I spend all my time doing “work” for my community, for art, for myself. I try to be the change I want to see.

I am grateful everyday that I am able to do this kind of thing. I am grateful everyday that I am culturally and socially privileged enough to not having to do that much labour and at the same time being able to do what I think is right and important.